Joe, 90 - A once-only spoof of the iconic character. The World Intelligence Agency decides to recruit Joe for a new mission, despite the fact he is now in his 90s and extremely frail. He is briefed on the dangerous mission (despite such a venture obviously being both physically and mentally beyond him) and placed in the 'Big Rat', only for him to die while his abilities are transferred. The strip ends with the agency deciding to call International Rescue.

SCROOGES: Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender with the simple inscription "Same to you". How come rap artist Dr. Dre can use the 'n' word on his multi-million selling albums and win a MOBO award, yet when I used it at my son's football match I was asked to leave the park? Once again, it's one law for the rich and another for the poor Norbert Colon – an old miser. In one strip, Colon shared top billing with hopeless ventriloquist Boswell Boyce ("he throws his voice") and wound up in a lunatic asylum; in another strip he went on a blind date only to find the dating agency had fixed him up with his own mother ("Oh turds! It's that tightwad son of mine!"), a dead ringer for Norbert only wearing a (clearly labelled) NHS wig. One strip featured a parody of A Christmas Carol involving his ancestor Ebenezer Colon, who is exactly like him; suggesting Norbert's miserly ways are hereditary. Nash Gordon – a futuristic benefits cheat who eventually gets found out when he goes to the benefits office planet instead of a driving range as a result of a dodgy sat-nav.

Having depression is a lot like winning the lottery! I'm heavily taxed and don't want to tell my family. The Modern Parents – and their long-suffering children, Tarquin and Guinevere. The two, Malcolm and Cressida, are middle-class, left-wing, self-absorbed and sanctimonious, often waxing lyrical about issues such as environmentalism. Their two sons, Tarquin and Guinevere (who was given a girls' name as his parents did not want to conform to gender stereotypes) are more down-to-earth, with Tarquin often, usually unsuccessfully, trying to reason with his parents.

Morris Day: Sexual Pervert - A moustachioed, jumper-wearing middle-aged man who is obsessed with pornography, ignoring his attractive wife who waits for him in their bedroom. The character is based upon soul star and Prince protege Morris Day.Junior Cop - a boy who acts like a policeman, informing a mother that her son has died (annoying her as it's not true, as her son is watching TV in the other room) and battering a confession out of his own mother (with the support of his father who is actually a policeman himself).