Radical Acceptance: Awakening the Love that Heals Fear and Shame

Product Information

Can we extend this friendly curiosity towards ourselves? The moments when we feel hurt, angry or afraid, are often the moments we most need to be kind towards ourselves. However, often the times when we need radical acceptance the most, are the times it might seem impossible to practice it. On this sacred path of Radical Acceptance, rather than striving for perfection, we discover how to love ourselves into wholeness.” pg. 45

Chapter 10 spoke about Radical Acceptance of others in fairly general terms. Now we’ll discuss specific ways to practice Radical Acceptance in our relationships with other people. This is a crucial step in spiritual growth—although spirituality is a deeply personal journey, humans are social beings by nature. She has been persuing a spiritual path for many years and speaks with knowledge and compasison. Yet, she admits that when she is continuously approached by a difficult student or her son misses the bus and has to be rushed to school, she sometimes gets caught up in the anxieties and difficulties of just living life. Again and again, it is mentioned that she has to keep reminding herself of her spirituality. I've been studying Buddhism since I went to India in 2006 to learn from Geshe Sonam Rinchen at the Tibetan Library and Archives in Dharmasala, India, and with the Dalai Lama at a mass teaching. Translating a religion from one culture to another is an immense task, and one that has been happening seriously for Buddhism the only in the last fifty years or so.At times anyone would have had a feeling of unworthiness, fear of rejection, sour to our family and friends, longing for fame, this would cause shame, distress, broken relations, reduce in productivity at work and decline in health. The author helps to resolve these problems with her personal experiences, case histories, Buddhist teachings and meditation practices. Each chapter ends with a meditation practice to let go of the negative emotion. Instead of berating ourselves for wanting a candy bar, for instance, we simply accept that at this point in time we feel the desire for a candy bar. That doesn’t mean we have to have one—though we could—we simply understand and accept our desire for what it is. A lot of the pains and fears we carry are the results of our relationships with other people. Therefore, we can’t truly heal while isolating ourselves. Community is a powerful and necessary force, and Radical Acceptance can help us to fully engage with it just as it helps us engage with our own inner lives. Radical Acceptance in Relationships

In our attempts to become “better,” we constantly observe and judge ourselves. We’re always on the lookout for imperfections; and, when we inevitably find some, it just drives us deeper into our sense of inadequacy. How often do you wish that you could change aspects of your personality, or be more like the people that you admire? Many of us are caught up in a web of deficiency, and beat ourselves up for our so-called failures. While many of us wish that we could celebrate the accomplishments of others, sometimes we feel envious or have a heightened sense of our own inability to achieve our goals. Other times we may feel vulnerable when criticized or don't perform at our best. If you look at the people around you, most of them experience these exact feelings of unworthiness. The good news is that we can shift our mindset and learn, not only to accept ourselves, but to radically accept who we are.Instead of feeling proud of yourself for overcoming challenges, you might resent how the day fell apart. You could even feel sad that you were met with so much misfortune, despite your best efforts.