The Madness: A Memoir of War, Fear and PTSD from Sunday Times Bestselling Author and BBC Correspondent Fergal Keane

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Part of his purpose in writing is to let others, who have had similar experiences, know that they are not alone.

The Madness: A Memoir of War, Fear and PTSD from Sunday Times The Madness: A Memoir of War, Fear and PTSD from Sunday Times

I made this film in Ukraine, with the women of Bucha [about Russian atrocities in the city]. One of them really wanted to do the interview and she got quite upset during it. Afterwards, I hated myself. I really did. Which, I suppose, begs the question, why am I still doing that?” and I began to have nightmares of Rwanda. And of course, at that stage, you know, it was obvious that I was traumatised but, again, did I go to a psychiatrist? No, I didn't. I kept doing the job. Keane and I are sitting in a hotel suite in Belfast and we’re talking about his book, The Madness: A Memoir of War, Fear and PTSD, a moving, thought-provoking exploration that delves further into the territory he explored in the BBC documentary Living with PTSD, broadcast earlier this year. Keane steps out from behind a news shield that has been so obviously dented and damaged by years of thinking, witnessing and seeing what can’t be unseen. Hearing what can’t be unheard.

And finally, the phrase call it a day means to stop what you are doing because you no longer want to. Once again, our six minutes are up. Goodbye for now! These experiences make his meeting with Beata Umubyeyi Mairesse, a poet who survived the genocide, one of the most moving parts of the book. He had unknowingly followed the convoy escorting her and her mother to safety – hidden under blankets and orphaned children – years earlier. “The girl who will help me years later is here. I have no idea of this. We do not know each other. She is hiding and I am too focused on all that is going on around me.” As an adult, she offers him a possible way of living with his painful memories. The Madness is engaging without resorting to sensation. Fluent prose follows the decline of the political situation - and of Keane’s own mental health - in chilling, compelling detail” - Observer Fergal Keane on the frontline in Donbas, Ukraine in 2016, as featured in his 2020 Horizon special Fergal Keane: Living with PTSD. Photograph: Unknown/BBC/Fergal Keane Fergal Keane opens doors into closed places. He lets us look inside those complex compartments where fear, anxiety, anger and panic lurk, and he tells a story of being afraid all of his life… beautifully written… This is an important book” - Irish Times

The Madness by Fergal Keane | Waterstones The Madness by Fergal Keane | Waterstones

In his research, he is gathering the information for his next questions, about how trauma is shared, or how it spreads and travels. Where did it begin for him? He is excavating deep roots. The telling of the story of Britain and Ireland has been dominated by narratives of conquest and rebellion in which a powerful empire attempts to subdue an indomitable native spirit – two different identities colliding throughout history. Fergal presents a more complex narrative. He begins with the old kingdoms of the Irish Sea, and travels through the time of the Vikings to the 19th and 20th century migrations, all the way to present day. Throughout the Irish have shaped literature, culture, politics and the physical landscape. Another book that left me with this level of discomfort and unease was Francisco Cantú’s The Line Becomes A River. Another book filled with immense intensity. To me, it’s unfathomable what people are capable of. And continue to be capable of.And thus this memoir in trying to understand and manage how it led to or brought out a dormant PTSD – despite supposing that perhaps it was always there through genetics (a plausible concept) and his early childhood instilling him with a very strong survival instinct resulting from family experienced trauma, and which was always at the root of and reason for all he did, leading him to alcoholism, self-medication, nervous breakdowns… And thus trying to understand the basis of what formed his PTSD, and how best to possibly manage it. I can visualise him writing it. Hear him reading it. Agonising. Trying to let it go. But, go to where? Ask Leona O’Neill to put peace into words after seeing what she saw on the cold ground of Creggan in Derry in April 2019 Keane drank intermittently as a teenager, but when he was 21, a girlfriend, concerned about his heavy drinking and the sadness that seemed to be fuelling it, referred him to a physician in Cork. The doctor told Keane he could never drink again or it would eventually kill him. Keane was prescribed antidepressants, took them, and abstained from alcohol for several years, but he returned to drinking with a glass of champagne in celebration of a new job. His subsequent career path did him no favours. War correspondents are generally a hard-drinking lot. Self-medication and temporary emotional-anesthetization with alcohol are common. Woman's Hour — Christina Lamb on Victoria Amelina, Alex South, Actor Beth Alsbury, Debbie and Helen Singer, Female photographers

The Madness by Fergal Keane and Breaking: Trauma in the The Madness by Fergal Keane and Breaking: Trauma in the

Fergal Keane opens doors into closed places. He lets us look inside those complex compartments where fear, anxiety, anger and panic lurk, and he tells a story of being afraid all of his life... beautifully written... This is an important book' Irish TimesKeane has not just the courage to risk death so that the most important stories can be told, as well as the eye to tell them with vivid subtlety, but also the humility to reveal the havoc that this task visits on the beholder' Spectator Does the size of your carbon footprint depend on where in the world you were born? Listen to find out!

The Madness by Fergal Keane review - The Guardian

I think about all of that in the context of the conflict in the North and, then, on its roads to an imperfect peace.Things have changed. Media organisations are much more conscious of the mental health of their journalists now. Recently, he says, “the old addict in me was saying, ‘Maybe I could get the train across to Kyiv’”. A colleague said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?” He laughs. “It was calm, deliberate. He was right ... Now you’re offered assessment the minute you’re out of a conflict zone. You’re also encouraged to take time off to just decompress.” What does recovery look like for him? “It’s a matter of figuring out those boundaries and working on them. You should never not have an emotional reaction to something that is moving but you can’t let it take you over. And that’s what I’m working on. You can empathise but there’s a limit to what you can do and it doesn’t belong to you ... I think the basics would be to keep my promise: no war zones ... And it means loving life, spending time with friends, playing music.”