In other words, there is no more to be said or discussed – all questions have been answered and all thoughts and emotions have been clearly communicated. Real closure will involve forgiveness – of self and others. You might not be ready to do that immediately following the discussion with your ex. Simply remind yourself that forgiveness is your goal. Do it for yourself. Feel grateful. While it’s definitely understandable to feel anger and resentment, try not to garner any animosity toward the other person, and instead thank them for all the great memories you both shared together. “Rather than blaming him, I can just thank him and move on,” Shah said, with regard to the breakup of her own serious relationship. “He gave me the best five years of my life, and I couldn’t be more thankful. It just gives me something to believe in.” This is the question that most people want answered: Why? Why did you do what you did or why did you fail to do something I wanted or was hoping you would do? As I reveal in my audio book, you have to have more than passion to make a relationship successful. You also need intimacy and commitment.

Find Closure- How To Heal A Hopelessly Loving Heart Find Closure- How To Heal A Hopelessly Loving Heart

Jessica Burgos pleaded guilty on Dec. 13, 2017, to conspiracy to possess with intent to distribute methamphetamine and was sentenced to 168 months in federal prison today by U.S. District Judge Marcia Crone. Closure does not, though, imply that your ex will apologize for all of his/her actions, nor does it imply that he/she will ask for your forgiveness. I will elaborate on these points shortly. Remember this key point: if you ask that question, your ex may give you an answer you don’t want to hear, even if it is something you need to hear. Your ex might rightly or wrongly blame you or your ex might reveal something about him/herself or about you that you were not expecting. Are you heartbroken, angry, lost, lonely, confused, depressed, hung up, or pining over your ex? Do you know how your ex is truly affecting you and do you want to benefit from personalize advice, action steps and revelations? Take my free breakup test and get your own personalized report.Review your list of self-exploration (what you experienced and what you want to communicate.) Now answer this question: What is the one thing you were afraid to say or communicate during the relationship and/or following the breakup of the relationship? Now add that question to your list.

finding closure by jessica burgos | TikTok finding closure by jessica burgos | TikTok

For more help, strategies and insights to help you get over your ex and have a new healthy, happy relationship, buy my new audio book/program “Get Over Your Ex Now!” Reframe the situation. Try to look at the outcome in a positive light. This may take time, but altering your way of thinking can help you channel your emotions. Maybe this ending is for the best and it will lead to a wonderful beginning. I believe in the ‘everything happens for a reason’ mantra: Usually, when a certain door is closed, it’s closed because it should be. Echoing the words of freelance writer Lynette Olson, “love is never really lost, simply adjusted or misplaced. Don’t let go of love, just redirect it. You might face painful losses, but grow from them.” What happens if the other person can’t give you closure? At that point, you have to accept that you can’t control the uncontrollable. (That includes others’ actions.) The core of this mindset is to let go of what you cannot change. Whether the other person is willing to hash it all out, or whether they are tight-lipped about it all, you ultimately need to give yourself closure. Below are some tips for embarking on the process. A critical component of closure is having all of your questions answered. As revealed by my Breakup Test, 30% of male and 30% female respondents said they are still “consumed by the drive to get answers about ‘Why?’ it happened.”Be open with your communication; be open to listening to the responses to your questions and to the things your ex wants or chooses to communicate to you. Allow yourself time to heal. This is probably one of the more difficult steps in the process; no one enjoys experiencing negative emotions. Don’t worry about feeling blue. Why wouldn’t you feel that way after a loss? Allow yourself the courage to confront the pain. Allow yourself moments to cry and wallow in those somber love songs (I have been there and can give many thanks to the singer/songwriter Adele). Hiding from these emotions — or even worse, numbing yourself via drugs or alcohol — may make you feel better in the short term, but the pain will still be present. It’s better to sort through the hurt now so it doesn’t creep up on you when you’re already in the midst of a new chapter. Accept responsibility for the role you played in the relationship. Be honest with yourself – how did you contribute to the final outcome or demise of the relationship? Did you push away your ex? Did you sabotage the relationship? Did you refuse to be vulnerable or commit emotionally? I define closure as having expressed all of your thoughts and feelings about the relationship and having received all of the answers to your questions – the communication is complete and you now have an enlightened perspective on the relationship.

Finding Closure - Psych Central Finding Closure - Psych Central

Be willing to accept the truth and your ex’s perspective – even if you do not agree with it. Remember, we all see the world through our own filters and our own programming. You and your ex may have wanted different things in life i.e. you both have different values, and that will impact their perspective. Accordingly, be open and willing to accept their perspective.

Now, let’s talk about the significance of finding closure following a breakup or other relationship challenge or impasse, and, the 6 steps to achieve closure.

Do you feel guilty or ashamed for something you have done or for your past relationship or Ex? Do you know the difference between guilt and shame? Watch the video and learn how to overcome guilt and shame. Now, let’s talk about the significance of finding closure following a breakup or other relationship challenge or impasse, and, the 6 steps to achieve closure. Remember that your ex might not be able to answer all of your questions and therefore you might need professional help to understand what happened and why it happened.